To pump or not to pump

We've actually settled the question, but it's all still a bit odd here.

Yesterday we went out and bought a breast pump. It's a lightweight Medela intended for occasional use. That meant we had to buy bottles and breast milk storage bags.

Anyway, there was some question as to whether or not Master A would take a bottle, but last night I pumped an ounce of breast milk. We put it in a bottle and Mistah C gave it to A. He gulped it down like nothing and cried when there was no more. So it seems to be going okay so far.

I'm a little torn. Part of me wanted him to not take a bottle (the "I want Mom and nothing else will do!" mentality); part of me didn't want to pump at all so that the whole feeding would be mine, kit and kaboodle. Part of me feels like a heel because pumping milk is essentially planning on being away from my baby at some point, even though I've got nothing planned that would separate us right now.

I know it's better to be pumping and that we're at the outside edge of him even accepting the bottle so it needed to happen this week. I'll appreciate having bottles of milk available if I want to go get my haircut and leave him with someone else. If I ever get stuck in traffic when we're apart and A needs to be fed, I'll be glad he takes bottles and that I've got milk in the fridge. If my milk changes taste after exercising and I just need to expel that milk to get to better milk, I'll be really glad to have the pump. But it's still sad. While I was pregnant, someone told me that after pregnancy, the job of the rest of the kid's immediate life (like the next 18 years) is separating from Mom. That's normal and proper, but I didn't think it would start happening so soon.